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Well...I got the job! I sort of already knew this was coming since I was hired from internal recruitment but I did still have to interview and the court still had to give me an official "offer" letter. It has been a week since I started with my new position. I would say it has gone pretty well. I am in training mode right now but so far so good.
This week has been my first week of full time employment in 10 years. I am scared to death! Scared that I won't be there enough for my kids, scared that my house in going to fall into the realm of complete messy, chaos and scared that I am going to let something fall through that cracks. I am definitely a control freak when it comes to certain aspects of our lives. Cleaning, organizing, the kids, our homemade meals, etc. I am going to have to learn how to redirect that urge to control and let my Trav step in. He will be taking the kids to two dental appointments this month as well as getting Taylor to her annual physical. He has never had to do these type of tasks within our household. He is absolutely capable and will do wonderful but I have issues letting go of the fact that I will not be there. So much so that I am swinging by in advance of Taylors physical to fill out all the appropriate paperwork. Again, he is totally capable but those type of tasks have been my responsiblity since their existance and I am not completely ready to cut the ties.
Obviously I know that I can not have it all. I can not work 40 hours a week, fulfill my childrens every need, keep my house spotless, run my desired 15 miles a week and still find time to spoon and snuggle with my husband. Luckily that has been my life for the past 9 years and now I feel it is the right time to split up the responsibilites a bit more between my Trav and the kids. I just have to let them load the dishwasher, maybe make their own luches once school starts and reside myself to the fact that it will be just fine if my floors don't get swept every single day.
This job is a good opportunity, that is what I keep reminding myself. This job will allow us to save a great deal of money towards our forever home. Not to mention the job experience I am gaining.
There is no doubt I.AM.TIRED! I am adjusting my schedule at home to accomodate the new hours. I am probably a bit more cranky at times and I definitely have been mumbling and babbling more this week. One the flip side, my Trav has really stepped up. He has been loading dirty dishes, helping with dinner and fixing me a cocktail. I feel like we are heading in the right direction and I hope that by the time school starts the end of this month we will have a good system in place and then just make minor adjustments for the kids schedules.
To compound my week, my mom was put into the hospital for untreated high blood pressure. Can I just say there is not a worse patient then a former/retired nurse. She resistantly agreed to go to the E.R. and was eventually admitted. It is very difficult to be far away when your parents are not well. My mom and I are very, very close. Over the years I have gotten better at dealing with her medical needs from afar but it is still so hard to be away from her when I feel like I should be close, taking care of her or helping my dad. She has reassured me that it is just a routine stay while they try to determine the cause of her high blook pressure but once again, I am left questioning why we live so far away. I am thankful that we honestly do get a good amount of time together considering the distance between us. Days like this remind my why it is so important to take advantage of traveling to their house as well as their willingness to come stay at our house. Every visit is quality and I cherish those times when I am at home on my couch and she is laying in a hospital bed in the Pac NW.
Tomorrow is Friday! I am looking forward to the weekend. The weather is supposed to be horrible which means we can sleep-in, rent some movies, catch up on household chores and run in the rain. I do not feel mentally ready for the upcoming winter season which will be here very soon but I am ready for it this weekend. I need a little down time to catch my breath, enjoy my family and prepare for another week.
Obviously I know that I can not have it all. I can not work 40 hours a week, fulfill my childrens every need, keep my house spotless, run my desired 15 miles a week and still find time to spoon and snuggle with my husband. Luckily that has been my life for the past 9 years and now I feel it is the right time to split up the responsibilites a bit more between my Trav and the kids. I just have to let them load the dishwasher, maybe make their own luches once school starts and reside myself to the fact that it will be just fine if my floors don't get swept every single day.
This job is a good opportunity, that is what I keep reminding myself. This job will allow us to save a great deal of money towards our forever home. Not to mention the job experience I am gaining.
There is no doubt I.AM.TIRED! I am adjusting my schedule at home to accomodate the new hours. I am probably a bit more cranky at times and I definitely have been mumbling and babbling more this week. One the flip side, my Trav has really stepped up. He has been loading dirty dishes, helping with dinner and fixing me a cocktail. I feel like we are heading in the right direction and I hope that by the time school starts the end of this month we will have a good system in place and then just make minor adjustments for the kids schedules.
To compound my week, my mom was put into the hospital for untreated high blood pressure. Can I just say there is not a worse patient then a former/retired nurse. She resistantly agreed to go to the E.R. and was eventually admitted. It is very difficult to be far away when your parents are not well. My mom and I are very, very close. Over the years I have gotten better at dealing with her medical needs from afar but it is still so hard to be away from her when I feel like I should be close, taking care of her or helping my dad. She has reassured me that it is just a routine stay while they try to determine the cause of her high blook pressure but once again, I am left questioning why we live so far away. I am thankful that we honestly do get a good amount of time together considering the distance between us. Days like this remind my why it is so important to take advantage of traveling to their house as well as their willingness to come stay at our house. Every visit is quality and I cherish those times when I am at home on my couch and she is laying in a hospital bed in the Pac NW.
Tomorrow is Friday! I am looking forward to the weekend. The weather is supposed to be horrible which means we can sleep-in, rent some movies, catch up on household chores and run in the rain. I do not feel mentally ready for the upcoming winter season which will be here very soon but I am ready for it this weekend. I need a little down time to catch my breath, enjoy my family and prepare for another week.
(There are no pictures, like I said the weather is gross. No opportunity to see something pretty or catch the kids in an adorable manner. It just is what it is. I worked all week, could barely keep my eyes open at night and I think it has rained 3 inches since breakfast.)
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