I pride myself....

I pride myself on being real!  What you see is what you get.  I'm honest, opinionated, strong but I can admit I'm also weak. Its seems like a contradiction but I don't think it is.  I don't ever want to hurt anyone, I don't enjoy conflict, I honestly avoid it at all cost.  My goal is to never be "seen" as weak and feeble.  I don't try to hide my weaknesse, I want to rise above them.  I want to be seen as a strong minded confident mother, wife, daughter, friend and coworker.  It is my job as a mother to teach my daughter how to be a strong, respectful, secure woman who can speak her mind in such a way as to not come across as a condescending bitch but more so as an intelligent women with an opinion who can speak respectfully and clearly.  Someone who can be admired.   Its also my job to teach my daughter how to listen, hear what someone is saying, mull it over without being hostile, spiteful and overly emotional. IT IS possible to listen to someone who is trying in a respectful way to get an uncomfortable point across, keep your emotions in check and walk away with your integrity.  

What I have been pondering the past few days is why is this so hard for people to accept.  Nothing recent has happened to me personally, this is more of a silent observation but it seems like our society cowers away from being real.  I have been witnessing more and more that people are severely lacking what I view as a valuable, personal strength.  Why can't we accept strong and respectful?  Why is strong and respectful viewed as ugly, bitchy and mean.  If something isn't said or presented in a fluffy, fun, beautiful way then, your being a bitch.  Your being hostile, your being mean.  I get that people don't like hearing things that are uncomfortable, harsh or not what they want to hear but when did people loose sight of the ability to listen and try and see the respect that is being given just by initiating a conversation.  

I'm not that women who is going to talk about you behind your back.  (ok..well except to my Trav.  He is my spring board for advice and I value his opinion above all others, so he doesn't count.)  I believe in saying what needs to be said.  If I can't say something to your face then I'm not going to say it to anyone else.  I don't have to like everyone and I don't have to love everyone but I can respect everyone enough to either keep my mouth shut or go to the source if the circumstance needs me to and say what needs to be said in a polite, respectful, calm way.   I love my friends, coworkers and family enough to give them that much respect.  I would hope that they view this as a strong asset verses being a bitch.  I would hope they would do the same for me.  I strive to keep the air around me clear and clean.  I don't want it polluted with unspoken words and pent up emotions.  

It bothers me to no end when people overreact, run to the nearest ear that will listen and regurgitate a conversation with unwarranted emotion.  Why not just hash it out with the only other person that needs to be involved?  I encourage my children, my mother, my friends and coworkers to come to me if they need.  I respect them for it.  What they might say could be uncomfortable and hurtful but at least they said it to me verses everyone else.

I respect the people I know who can hold their own in a beautiful way so much more then the people who try to tell everyone what they think someone wants to hear.  I respect a person who can come to me with harsh words so much more then the person who chooses to talk behind my back.  I respect the person who can have an uncomfortable conversation with me and discuss it openly more then the person who runs away from me in a moment of emotional weakness and then avoids me.  I respect the person who can be a sound minded adult much more then the person who acts awkwardly, childish.   

I'm a strong woman!  My opinions are my own and I own them.  I don't let others sway or influence how I feel.  I respect each person accordingly and ONLY show them the amount of respect I think they are worthy of.  I have a strong opinion so don't ask for my opinion if you only what me to tell you what you want to hear.  It's likely not going to happen.  I respect people for how they treat me, my family and my friends.  If you are lacking in that department I'm likely to completely steer clear of you.  If you overreact at the drop of a dime, well...shame on you.  Clear your mind, get your emotions in check and talk to me or whoever the person might be.  Life's to short to be drama, bring drama and feed into drama.  Let's just all be real, be strong and be comfortable talking to one another!  I guarantee you will feel better about yourself and any pending situations.  The daily grind can be exhausting enough without it being bogged down by B.S.